One of the most common problems faced by both men and women in today’s world is the reduction in sexual urge and desire or low libido.

For most men and women, a decreased desire for sex is a combination of poor habits, health issues, decreased testosterone and other hormonal issues, erectile dysfunction (ED), stress and time-cramped lifestyles.

The good news is that there are ways to help increase your libido naturally. However, to naturally increase your waning libido, you’ll need to commit to the necessary steps below.

1. Exercise improves sexual performance
One of the best ways to improve your health is cardiovascular exercise. While sex might get your heart rate up, regular exercise can help your sexual performance by keeping your heart in shape and exercise will make you better in bed. Thirty minutes a day of sweat-breaking exercise—running, swimming, etc.—can do wonders to boost your libido and prepare you for the bedroom. Exercise is also a great way to reduce stress. Stress can wreak havoc on all areas of your health, including your libido.
Even if you are drop dead tired from the day’s activities, you could spend a half hour exercising and feel completely rejuvenated. One of the most incredible times to have sex is right after working out. Exercise also helps you to have a great night of sleep when you finally turn in for bed and being well rested is fundamental component for a healthy sex life.

2. Get Some Sun
There seems to be something about summer that revs the sexual engine. Getting outside and letting the sun hit your skin can help wake up your sex drive, especially during the winter months when the body produces more melatonin. Melatonin is a hormone that helps us sleep but also quiets our sexual urges.

Female sex drive improves with exposure to sunlight. The reason is hormones. A hormone that stimulates sex called Melanocyte Stimulating Hormone (MSH) increases the sex drive in women and it is secreted in the body when there is bright sunlight.

Also new research from Italy, the land of past and love, suggests that low levels of vitamin D increase your risk of erectile dysfunction. Insufficient levels of D may spur the production of free radicals called super-oxide ions. These free radicals deplete your nitric oxide, a molecule that helps your blood vessels function properly. The result: It makes it difficult to get hard. Nitric oxide causes the blood vessels to relax, which increases the blood flow and causes an erection. Increase your levels of vitamin D acquired through sunlight and your body will produce more testosterone.

Finally studies also show that with increased luminosity of sunlight, the production of serotonin also increases, a feel good neurotransmitter. That’s why you feel like having sex more in spring and summer. Serotonin, a feel-good neurotransmitter produced by the brain, may also be responsible for heightened mood and sex drive during spring and summer

3. Food that improves your sex stamina
After exercise and sunlight, diet is the next biggest factor in improving libido levels. Testosterone and oestrogen production is necessary for sexual arousal as well as sexual stamina, and a bad diet can limit the production of these necessary hormones. A healthy balance of vitamins and minerals keeps your endocrine system humming, which in turn regulates the production of the hormones oestrogen and testosterone, essential for sexual desire and performance.
Indeed, certain foods are useful when it comes to increasing sexual stamina and libido for both women and men. Food and sex as it turns out, are closely linked. Want an extra boost in the bedroom? Load up your trolley with these all-natural aphrodisiacs listed below.

Oysters: Oysters are bursting with zinc, a mineral used in the production of testosterone (and sperm), which plays a role in fuelling the sex drive of both men and women.

Fish: Omega-3 acids found in fish like salmon and tuna, as well as avocados and olive oil, these types of fats increase blood flow. They are the building blocks of sex hormones in men and women help raise dopamine levels in the brain that trigger arousal.

Onions & Garlic: While not great for your breath, these two foods help your circulation as it contains allicin an ingredient that increases circulation.

Bananas: This potassium-rich fruit can help lower your blood pressure, which can benefit your important sexual parts and boost sexual performance.

Chocolate: Chocolate is another well-known sexual stamina food, it contains phenylethylamine, a chemical which produces a feeling of euphoria. This food also contains the stimulant theobromine as well as multiple antioxidants for a healthy immune system.

Oatmeal: Plenty of us wake up to a bowl of piping hot porridge without being aware of its sexual potency. Eating oatmeal is one of the few natural ways to boost testosterone in the bloodstream. Oats contain acid arginine; that enhances the effect nitric oxide has on reducing blood vessel stiffness. Like Viagra, it helps relax muscles around blood vessels in the penis. When they dilate, blood flow increases so a man can maintain an erection.

Watermelon: This super-sweet fruit is also a sex-booster. First, bright-red watermelon contains an amino acid called citrulline, which helps relax and dilate blood vessels, naturally increasing blood flow to sexual organs.

Red wine: Italian researchers recently found that the antioxidants and alcohol in the wine may trigger the production of nitric oxide in the blood, which helps artery walls to relax, increasing blood flow to the genitals.

Celery: Raw celery boosts production of androsterone, an odorless hormone released through male perspiration. While you can’t smell it, androsterone apparently acts as a pheromone, triggering female attraction.

Chilies & Peppers: All-natural spicy foods help your blood flow by reducing hypertension and inflammation.
Eggs: Like avocados, eggs contain B vitamins, which help to balance hormone levels and fight stress.

Nuts: Many varieties, including walnuts, hazelnuts, almonds, pine nuts, Brazil nuts, and peanuts, contain the essential amino acid, arginine. Arginine has been shown to dilate blood vessels, improving blood flow to the genitals, which in turn may enhance arousal and intensify orgasms.

Pumpkin seeds: Pumpkin seeds contain zinc important in testosterone production for men and helps to sustain sexual desire in women.

Mint: Popping a mint before kissing your partner is not only courteous, it’s also a turn-on. Having a fresh smelling mouth makes people more shagable.

Strawberries: Strawberries are high in the folic acid that helps prevent birth defects, and vitamin C, a potential libido booster. Strawberries dipped in melted dark chocolate anyone? Ideal for a great morning-after breakfast in bed, so you have energy for round 2.

Watch this YouTube video below on 10 foods that will boost your libido:

https://youtu.be/ZayMdTrOkVY?t=5s

If you are looking at ways and means to increase your sexual drive, then you can try out a combination of the above foods to enjoy increased libido. It’s never a bad decision to exercise, enjoy the sun in moderation, eat right, and enjoy your sex life to the fullest extent.

Nobody likes a starfish in bed, good sex is only great when a man looks at his girl and she’s actively enjoying herself. She can keep up with the physical intensity of sex.

Men want and need to know that the woman is really into having sex specifically with them. Sex can only be enjoyed when both parties are doing the work together.

Enjoying and being good at sex requires certain muscle toning and exercise that is tailored for sex. Next time you are at the gym or exercising at home, think about the muscles you use during sex. Do you enjoy the cowgirl position? You’ll need to do squats; lunges and bridges exercises to nail this position and rip all its rewards.

Exercise your way to better sex – you’ll be shocked at how much your sex life improves with these simple exercises ladies. Whether you want to improve the quality of your sex life—or just have better luck getting in the mood.

Below are exercises that will make you into a sex goddess and have more intense orgasms.

1. Endurance exercises.

Endurance exercises aside from increasing endurance; it increases your sex drive, it will give you energy and it helps you get in the mood.

Good sex requires you to be able to go at it till the job is done. Sometimes you get it done in 10 minutes and sometimes it takes 20 minutes or more. Nothing feels better than laying down exhausted after a good romp.

Fortunately there are plenty to choose from: cycling, jogging, brisk walking and swimming. Aim at doing 30 minute sessions.

2. The plank

The plank is an excellent core builder, works the upper arms, abdominals, obliques, thighs and buttocks, all the areas that count when you’re having sex ladies.

These are important muscles that help stabilize you when you are on all fours, or any position where the woman is on top, or in transition from one position to another while maintaining close genital contact with your partner.

Do the move

Lie face down, push up and hold your body off the ground using your toes and forearms for support. Keep your back straight. Hold for 30-60 seconds and do daily. As you become stronger increase the time you hold the plank.

Watch below for proper form:

3. Squats and Lunges

You already know this move as a terrific leg and butt toner, but did you know that it can also get the blood flowing to the places that may energize your libido? Plus squats and lunges loosen your hips making your pelvis more flexible.

Many women need a little physical help with arousal to get blood flowing to the genitalia. Squats are great way to get your blood flowing for some loving. So before you get to bed get squatting.

Do the move:

With your feet spread shoulder-width apart, make sure your heels stay on the floor as you ‘sit’ on an imaginary chair,” she explains. The lower you squat, the more you engage your glutes and reap the benefits. Push off from your heels and hold your abdominals in tightly. Do them slowly, aiming for 15 to 30 reps.

4. Bridge Pose

This exercise helps strengthen the lower back, gluteus muscles and hamstrings.
Want to make missionary position work wonders? Bridge pose is an excellent exercise. It helps enhance a woman’s sexual experience because it increases her strength and endurance in these muscles, which are used to create resistance during a man’s thrusting while she’s in a missionary position, thereby increasing the intensity of the thrust.

Do the move:

Start out lying flat on your back with your knees bent and your feet flat on the floor. Lay your arms to the side of your body, lift your hips up in the air and squeeze your gluteus muscles. Continue to press upward until just your upper back/shoulders, arms and feet are touching the floor. Hold this position for 10 seconds, breathing normally, then slowly lower back down to the floor and relax for a few seconds before repeating again. Aim for three sets of 10 reps each.

Watch how to do bridge properly below:

5. Strong toned arms

Give your arms the strength they need to hold your body weight up when you are in a reverse cowboy position, when you’re on top facing him or when you on your fours. You guy is underneath you and you are going to do the thrusting, you need your strong arms.

Do the move:

There is an array of exercises to get your arms strong, but we’ll stick with using dumbbells, as they are easy and versatile too. You can incorporate dumbbells into your other exercises like squatting.
To get those strong toned arms you need a set of 5 kg and later 10kg dumbbells.
Start with 10 arm curls building up to 15 and doing 10-15 reps, as you get stronger increase the amount of arm curls.

Below is a video that can be useful for both men and women on how to exercise for sex.

Include these moves into your exercise routine and you will become an insatiable sex goddess. Surprise your guy with your newfound strength, endurance and sexual appetite.

If you want to make the most of your next sexual encounter, you should watch what you eat in the lead-up.

There’s a range of foods that will increase your blood glucose level, leading to fatigue and a lower sex drive.

Here’s what the good and the bad:

Bad – Hot dogs

It looks suggestive, but throwing back a wiener will not guarantee a good time.

The high saturated fat content clogs the penile and vaginal arteries, which is obviously sub-optimal when it comes to pleasure.

Not to mention, they’re generally made of low-grade meat, and lead to high rates of inflammation which can send your hormones out of whack.

Bad – Hot chips

Why is something so good just so bad for us?

If you’re planning to get down, you’d best dodge the chippies today. As with hot dogs, the trans-fats are shocking for testosterone and circulation.

And the high salt content can make it trickier for men with high blood pressure to stay erect.

And for healthy people, the salt content can cause bloating – the least sexy thing your body can do besides farting.

Go for a baked tater instead. Your body will thank you for the feel-good chemical dopamine.

Bad – Vending machine snacks

You might be fanging for a Snickers, but the spike in your blood sugar will subside and then you’ll be hungrier than ever.

For a snack, opt for raw nuts or raw veggies.

Bad – Mint

Fresh breath is a must-have for sex, but getting yourself into mint condition could hurt your performance in the sack.

The menthol in peppermint has been shown to reduce testosterone, which sends your sex drive crashing.

And chewing gum is no better. The mastication brings air into your system, making you burp. Not hot.

Good – Bananas

It’s the vitamin B in bananas that boosts your sexual performance. It increases your energy production and reduces stress.

There’s a bunch of other good stuff in every banana, like tryptophan (an amino acid that helps produce our feel-good hormone, serotonin), potassium (used to produce sex hormones), and bromelain (an enzyme that improves blood flow and increases libido).

Good – Pumpkin and sunflower seeds

Men, these will boost our zinc levels, which are crucial for improving sperm health and testosterone levels.

They’re also full of health fats, vital for sexual health.

Good – Celery

Is your diary a little empty? Bring celery back to your diet, gents.

Eating celery can increase the pheromone androsterone, which is a natural aphrodisiac found in men’s sweat.

Also, it can help dilate blood vessels, which increases sex drive and enhances climax.

Got any good pre-shag food tips? Let us know below!

Source: news.com.au

Independent:
She’s financially independent. She doesn’t care how much you earn either. She doesn’t expect you to pay for everything. All she wants from you is a fun time – She just wants you!!

Confidence:
She knows what she wants and isn’t afraid to let you know it. She is confident about her sexuality, has overcome a lot of biased and hang-ups and she has sex when and if she wants to.

No Drama:
She won’t have a temper tantrum or cry easily and has no insecurities. She won’t freak out if she doesn’t hear from you for a few days. She’s busy with her own life too.

Life Experience:
She is socially and sexually savvy. You will become a man and a better lover as a result of being with her.

She is Interesting:
She can hold a conversation; she’s lived, travelled and experienced life. She has a lot to talk about. She has ideas, opinions and passion. Not a dull moment whether you’re talking her or making out with her.

No Pressure:
She’s generally not interested in settling down, having a family, she has done that already. She’s into having fun.

Responsible:
She’s not into wasting her time or yours. She’s not into games. No more guessing games and wondering if you getting ‘some’ tonight.

Understanding:
She understands men. Need we say more!!!

Ideal woman:
She is hassle free, she has her act together, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically and sexually balanced. She’s the ideal woman.

Interested in what others think about cougars? Read the forums!
‘Cougars.’ Read it here
‘Another topic about cougars but with a twist.’ Read it here
‘Mature Myth.’ Read it here

Watch the video below for plenty of laugh-out-loud reasons why the lads should date an older female.

A lot of people immediately feel awkward or uncomfortable at the thought of meeting a couple where one partner is more enthusiastic than the other about swinging which is only natural. We’ve all heard stories about couples where one partner is gung-ho while the other has simply come along just to make up numbers. You know. The wife who sits quietly in the corner sipping soft drinks and avoiding eye contact while her husband shags the entire club? Or the hornbag girlfriend who can’t get enough while her man bows out after round one and seems more content tweeting on his iPhone? It just seems so wrong.

Or is it really that wrong? I get that we want to give a wide berth to couples where it’s blatantly obvious that one partner is completely against the idea of swinging but participates just to keep the peace. No one wants to get physical with people who aren’t really giving themselves to you willingly in lustful abandon. Neither does anyone want to be friends with someone who is selfish enough to ignore the well-being of their own partner in the name of getting their rocks off. But what if the couple you meet are terrifically great people who love each other deeply but just simply don’t swing with synchronised enthusiasm?

If you think about how one couple can often have mis-matched sex drives, it should really come as no surprise that differing libidos can affect how that couple plays in the swinging scene. The less highly sexed partner may still enjoy all the benefits of being in the lifestyle but doesn’t need to do much more than kiss and fondle a little to get their jollies. It often doesn’t have anything to with sexual attraction either as many people are turned on by their play partners but just don’t feel the need to play for a long time or in any intense way. That partner’s sex drive may also differ from month to month and due to factors such as stress and even self-esteem (eg – he or she may feel less sexy with winter weight on). Does that mean such couples shouldn’t participate in the scene at all?

As a couple who has an equal lust for swinging, it may come as a shock to end up in bed with another couple only to find that as the night progresses there only appears to be three people playing. For some though, it may end up being an ideal scenario, particularly for couples who enjoy threesomes. However, having uneven numbers is unnerving for others. This may especially be the case for newer couples who may expect swinging to be a completely balanced thing and couples who may have had issues in the past with one partner getting more attention than the other due to the non-participation of one partner from the other couple. No one likes getting left out!

So are we more or less offended by such imbalances because someone misses out on some element of the action while someone else in the mix gets more than their perceived fair share of attention? Even the most experienced and laid-back couples have dealt with the friction caused by this sort of inequality but does this really speak more about how inflexible some other people are in the scene and their own personal insecurities? After all, if we’re meant to enjoy watching our partner enjoy themselves sexually, should it really matter if for one night you’re not getting as much sexy time as your partner? If anything, does playing with a couple who has differing appetites for swinging force you to see how well your own relationship can tolerate an imbalance in sexual attention?

Perhaps the issue is more to do with how often this sort of swinging imbalance occurs in your playtime. Certainly, one night may be excusable but if the same scenario keeps playing out and it’s not to your liking then it’s time to speak up. The couple you otherwise adore may be happy for the guy to pound away while his lady provides the occasional hand pump or nipple tweak but if that doesn’t really suit you then you should address that point to them or find some new friends who like an equal measure of flesh pounding. Even the most non-jealous person would still prefer an even playing field at the end of the day.

If a swinging imbalance happens on the first play date and you’re sure you won’t play with that couple again, you may as well enjoy whatever you can out of it. If you’ve found yourself in a room with straight woman with a voyeuristic husband who clearly wants your partner to ride her to paradise and back, you can either be gracious and let your man have some fun or join in to give him a mind-blowing FMF threesome. If you find yourself twiddling your thumb at some point then there’s certainly nothing wrong with having a word with your partner and ending the night amicably. If the swinging imbalance is just completely unacceptable to you then it’s important to ensure that your partner knows how you feel and make your excuses.

Where you’ve had some great sexual times with a couple who have slowly started to show signs of differing sexual appetite then you need to weigh the pros and cons of remaining play friends with them. If it doesn’t bother you that one partner is less active than the other, then you can carry on with your merry ways. After all, unless you’ve struck up an monogamous swinging relationship with that couple, you’re bound to meet other dynamic duos who can match your enthusiasm, one for one. The important thing is to not take things personally either and wind up believing that someone’s lack of enthusiasm is your fault.

If you happen to be a couple whose individual interest in swinging differs a little or even a lot, the best thing you can do is talk openly about it with each other. If the less interested partner makes a clear indication that they’d rather not swing at all, then that decision has to be honoured. If they are genuinely interested and otherwise happy to be a part of the lifestyle then you both need to be mindful of how that may still affect the way you play with other couples. There’s no point going to an orgy if it’s highly likely that your partner will prefer to just engage in soft swinging. Out of courtesy, it may also be a good idea to ensure that the more enthusiastic partner doesn’t make a total pig of themselves (unless the other people clearly don’t mind).

If seeking couples on RedHotPie, your profile may be the best opportunity to make mention that your partner may be on the shy side or that there are certain things that they prefer not to do. It may limit the type of people who take interest in you to some extent but it will certainly save you problems later.

I ask this important question because the huge proliferation of ED ads that peppers every televised sporting event seems to have had an effect on Apple’s app store.

Perhaps stimulated by the success of such fine products as Viagra and Cialis, an ambitious developer called Health Code has released “Fire Up Your Sex Drive,” an app that promises to revolutionize the way you interact with your Apple equipment.

The promises made by “Fire Up Your Sex Drive” are enormous. In the app store, it declares that “after 20 days your sexuality will be enhanced by more than 85 percent.”

The effect, it says, is close to that of Viagra. And all you have to swallow is the developer’s rationale. The app allegedly “makes a kind of high-frequency alpha wave to synchronize with your own brain wave.”

If you already sufficiently excited that you are willing to commit $2.99 to this fine product (and, perhaps, to your current relationship), might I offer a few words of caution?

One surely has to be very careful about words that app developers use. So the folks behind “Fire Up Your Sex Drive” offer these: “It could stimulate your brain to adjust endocrine system and produce some male sex hormone.”

Which might cause your own brain to be stimulated with these words: “It could stimulate your brain to a sudden craving for green tomatoes.” Or perhaps: “It could stimulate your brain to wear turquoise underwear.” Or even: “It could stimulate your brain to believe that your body is an oil well.”

Apple does warn in its store that this product may only be bought by people over the age of 17. It also suggests that it contains: “Frequent/Intense Sexual Content or Nudity.”

However, some men might be distraught that the makers require that they should spend a long time lending their ears to this audio every day. Yes, six minutes.

Supposedly 580 men have already had the fire placed under them. And “the effective percentage is even more than 77 percent.”

One can only hope that those who trust their lives to data can let the rest of humanity know whether this is, indeed, one of the great scientific breakthroughs of the 21st century.

Source: cnet.com

Question#2: My wife and I have been married for 24 years and are very much in love! Unfortunately my wife has a very low sex drive, and always has! How can we improve this? We have not discussed this as a couple as I don’t want to hurt her feelings. Whenever we get intimate we always end up making love, and the sex is great, but I always have to be the leader in sex. I often feel as though I am pushy? Any suggestions Sam?

See what Sam has to say to these two guys here

Women with a higher sex drive than their husbands were becoming increasingly vocal about their suffering, sex therapist Bettina Arndt has said.

“There has been as steady trickle of women coming to me complaining that they are not getting enough sex,” she said.

“There are women out there who want a lot of sex and whose husbands simply can’t keep up.”

Arndt, who is the author of The Sex Diaries, said four out of 10 sexually frustrated women she had recently been corresponding with had ended their relationships because of the problem.

Sydney psychologist and sex therapist Serena Cauchi said she had also noticed the trend.

“It is not as uncommon as you would think,” she said.

“There are women who have come to me who have a higher sex drive than their husbands.

“Women may react just as men may do in this situation; some have affairs and some choose to end the relationship.”

One Melbourne woman, who did not wish to be named, told ninemsn she had been sexually frustrated for at least half of her 14-year marriage.

“When we first got together, there was never an issue with my husband’s sex drive, we would have sex at least five times a week,” she said.

“But in the last seven years he has become less and less interested — now we would probably only have sex once a week.”

The 42-year-old woman said her self esteem had “taken a battering” because of the constant rejection from her husband.

“Having a husband who is hardly interested in having sex with me anymore has made me feel like it’s my fault.”

“I feel like a failure as a wife and as a woman.”

Arndt said one of her subjects, “Barb”, had only had sex twice in the last 17 years.

Women who found themselves in a similar situation often felt hurt and wounded, she said.

“It is an intolerable thing for them because they think they are not desirable — it eats away at them not being wanted.”

“They are often perplexed because they talk to their friends who are all complaining about having to beat their husbands off with a stick.”

Arndt said more research needed to be done to find out why some men were troubled by a low sex drive, a task made more difficult because men were often unwilling to talk about it.

“We need to find out more about what is happening to the men and why.”

Source: ninemsn