It seems everyone has a perspective as to what constitutes being a ‘typical’ swinger. For those who have been around a while usually realise that the there isn’t a ‘typical’ swinger, and discover that swingers and swinging is at its best when it is whatever works best for you as a couple.

Try not to judge others for what works for them. You’ll surprise yourself often when you realize a bit later down the line that what you shunned yesterday and didn’t seem to identify with is the very thing you are into today.

You’ll also find many people change what they identify as or what they’ll do, often based on factors in their own life. Comfort level, attraction, personal growth, insecurities, new and past experiences all contribute to what we are and what we want right now.

Is it true then to say that there is no strict definition for what ‘swingers’ are? Sure, it is comforting to have tidy labels, but the truth is swinging may take on a wide variety of different forms. Considering there are all types of couples and singles with an endless array of sexual likes. Let’s start with the hypothesis that we have the best experiences when there are many ‘types’ and ‘styles’ of swingers. With this in mind, let’s list some of the types or subcultures of swinging:

Erotic Swinging

Also known as Voyeurism and Exhibitionists. This is where partners/coupes only want to be watched or do the watching. They do not want to be touched or interfered with in any way and get their excitement from the thrill of being watched by several people or watching others.

Soft swap

Couples or partners that choose to “soft swap” with other couples or singles. It involves others touching, kissing, oral but not partners swapping for penetration.

Full swap

This type can include everything soft swap does as well as penetration. It could literally mean anything. A full swap couple may be fine with dinner and dancing and then sex. Or it could also mean meeting in a hotel room for a group orgy without knowing anyone’s name.

Same room or separate room swingers

This is what it sounds like. It typically refers to full swap or at least partner swapping soft swap. Swingers that play in the same room (with opposite partners) or that are willing to play in separate rooms. Swingers are often polarized and one type of the other can often be a deal breaker. Though plenty of swingers will do both depending on how comfortable they are. Same room seems to be the more common preference, but like anything in the lifestyle, you can find anything you are looking for if you’re patient enough.

Hardcore Swingers

These people typically don’t want any kind of connection. You may or may not see them around often, but they typically don’t want to cultivate relationships, have feelings or get too close to anyone other than their partner. They know exactly what they want, how they want it, and who they want it with. They insist on anonymous sex with those whose names they don’t even know.

Social Swingers

These swingers typically enjoy friendships and/or relationships of varying degrees.
This is when a couple enjoys being among swingers and its sexy atmosphere. At no time do they send you messages of wanting to play. They do not go to the playrooms even for a quick look. They just enjoy the energy of being around a more open crowd, where they can freely talk, flirt and dress sexy.

Girl on girl

These swingers are often married, though single females are often welcome as well. Men do not typically engage with the women during events. It is fairly female dominated. Men may or may not be allowed to watch and the primary focus is women getting to play with other women. Just like all types of swinging, this could lead to anything all parties agree too.

Bisexual Male Swingers

These are swingers who are either bi-curious or are looking for a bisexual male experience. Often their encounters starts as girl on girl encounter and after much talk and if all parties are comfortable and open to it might progresses into a MMF experience. Due to social perception the latter is still a bit taboo among many swingers. Still to today, at most swing venues, bisexuality is encouraged among women, but not so much among men-at least in public. Bi-Sexuality with men is much more common than people think, and because of the stigma attached to it, it is done behind closed doors.

Cuckold Swingers

The cuckold fetish is a sexual fantasy that many men and swingers secretly have. This is not a new fantasy at all; it has been around for a long time but was less accepted and not openly spoken of. The fantasy revolves around the man getting sexually excited from the idea or sight of his wife being with another man, and sometimes feeling humiliated by the superiority of the other man. This last part isn’t always at play, though it is about sperm competition.

Many man find the prospect of watching their wives have sex with other guys to be sexually arousing. For a lot of men, this is a major turn-on, and can help their sexual performance. Think about how much hotter men are early on in the relationship when things are a bit uncertain.

Like everything sexual, cuckolding has many variations, motives and incentives but more on that in another post.

Greedy Girl

Where the women are allowed to be with another man but in this case in the absence of the male companion. In the cuckold fantasy the male can watch and enjoys watching his wife being ravished right in front of him by another man. Greedy girl the male partner will enjoy hearing or knowing about their wives’ adventures later.

Dogging swingers

DOGGING is the sexual practice of having sex in public places, especially parks, deliberately taking the chance of being watched. Dogging combines technology with swinging, cruising and voyeurism.
Crowds, big and small, watch exhibitionist couples who’ve met on the Internet have sex in cars, and sometimes join in.
Dogging appears to be popular and widespread, attracting heterosexual couples and single men and women of all ages. Not surprisingly, however, dogging meets tend to attract more men than women.

Fetish Swingers

Swingers have an avid appetite for a variety of sex and sexual acts, one of which is fetishes. Fetish is an umbrella term that includes role-play, foot-fetish, forced-sex/rape fantasy, strap-on, erotic spanking and many more.
These swingers are not so much interested in sexual intercourse swapping as much as they are in their shared fetish interests, which might eventuate into sex.

Group swinging/Orgies

Group swinging / gang bang or orgy, is a specialized form of group sex in which one individual, either a woman or a man, has sexual intercourse with multiple partners in turn. There are some specialized forms of gang bang activities: lesbian gang bang, cream pie gang bang, gay gang bang etc…

Hot Wife

In many ways Hot Wife is an extension of cuckold fantasy. In this the wife sets up casual sex dates with other men. Typically she or her date take photos and send them to the husband. The husband receives sexual gratification knowing his wife is doing something sexually with another guy. We think this particular part of the Lifestyle is more common than most people realize, however is not discussed because the husband feels it may reflect negatively on him. If you feel that you want to see your wife with another man, we encourage you to talk to her about it.

Open marriage swinging

Open marriage swingers are those couples who are comfortable with playing separately. Each person is free to pursuit ‘opportunities’ or casual flings in the absence of the other. The lines here sometimes get a bit blurred when some couples allow these flings to become relationships, however long they turn out to be. Is this being polyamorous or swinger? Swingers and polyamorous often overlap and seem to mesh. The difference between the two traditionally lies in that polyamory is about relationships and swinging is about recreational sex. In short, polys = love and Swingers= sex. To reiterate the very beginning of this post, it would be simple and straightforward to have tidy labels but the truth is there is a lot of blending within the many subcultures in swinging culture.

Swingers soon realise that they fall within 3, 4 or more of any of these subcultures and other are happy to stay within one, however through the life of swinging the majority of swingers see themselves move from one subculture to another. Conservative swingers and their couple centric world have slowly dissolved into a more accepting of alternative lifestyles, and hence swingers today are more likely to experiment with lots of different things through their swinger’s life.

Please remember that this lists or breakdown could never be complete. If you don’t see what you identify as or want, trust us, it’s out there even if it’s not named here. On that note, why don’t you share yours with the rest of us?